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For some time now I have been thinking and rethinking the direction of this blog (and my life's direction). I have vacillated back and forth between concentrating on one thing or keeping it as it is. The fact is, I am many things. Many, many things.

Like the song, Nothing in Between, by Meredith Brooks: I'm a little bit of everything, all rolled into one, I'm a bitch, I'm a lover, I'm a child, I'm a mother, I'm a sinner, I'm a saint, I do not feel ashamed, I'm your hell, I'm your dream, I'm nothing in between.

So, that's the consensus, this blog will stay the same. I knit, crochet, sew, read, make my own products, and ramble on. But, in my rambles, there is also some insight. It might take me some time to see any insight. But, that's how I roll. Like it or not. I do not conform for anyone. Not even for the chance of money or popularity. I am my own person. The direction of my life will go the way I want it to. All my bad posts will stay on here because that is who I am.

I have been on a quest for years to acquire inner peace and calmness. I have changed in many ways. I have learned to slow down and enjoy life. People are the most important aspect. Not things or money or the way my house is.

Last night, I have finally had some revelations about my life and what I do for a living. I have to be true to myself. Going on the way I am is sucking the soul from me. I can't live that way. I do not go with the flow and conform to Nazi regimes. I do not like rules and regulations. I will not sit back and give in and be a doormat or a puppet. Change is coming. It has been in the works for a year now. Change is slow. But, it will come. I will survive and be happy. My way.

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Early this morning we had an eclipse of the moon. It was a full moon and the eclipse turned the moon red. I have been noticing the effects of the moon on my body and mood since September when I had a return of my panic attacks.I finally feel that I've conquered that with the help of meds and meditations. Lot's of meditation, relaxing music, plenty of spiritual reading, and soul searching. 

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Conflicting Feelings

My fingers are itching to type and my mind is in overdrive again. It's scary to pour your heart out. But, I did get a good response on my last post. The response was on Facebook. I really really wish people would comment on the blog post itself also :)

Well, maybe I should explain why I am so upset with religion??

Religion specifically Christianity;

We are taught:

To be separate from the world; to not mix and mingle with the world; if you do you will be influenced by them for the badTo just listen to God's laws and if you don't you are a problemThat we are not to believe in rituals and spiritualism  To listen to God and not ourselves; we just can't be trustedTo look down on people who are not us or who think and act differently (yes, I hear your protests that this is not so)That we are sinners who can never measure up 
Why is this bothering me so?
It has caused me nothing but anxiety attacks and low self-esteemIt has inhibited me from further progressing; my mind has never …

The Best Darn Stain Remover

I got this recipe from Pinterest. This is great for any stain you might have. It's the only thing I use. And it's easy. Easy is my middle name. In more ways than one lol.
In a Spray Bottle mix:

1 part of Dawn Dishwashing Detergent (the old blue kind)
2 parts of Hydrogen Peroxide

Shake. Spray. Throw in the wash.

That's it. It's stinky. But don't let that stop you. It works and it's easy. When you put it through the wash you can't smell it anymore. I promise.