Skip to main content

Sisters of a Broken Marriage

I was 9 and my sisters were 6 and 7 maybe when our parents split up. I didn't have much to do with my father but my sisters went to visit him every weekend. When the divorce was being finalized there was so much contention between my parents trying to undermine each other and trying to prove each others unfitness as parents. The powers that be took us each into a room and asked us one after the other where we wanted to live.

Me and my youngest sister went with my mother. My other sister choose my father. And so the separateness began and our own ideas about the other that was not based on truth. My mother was upset that my sister choose my father. We were upset thinking she choose the money over her mother. Of course, I'm sure that idea was planted in our heads by mom.

Over the years, me and Jen, went back and forth from living with mom and dad. Her more than me. Us sisters could only get along so long before the death fights would begin. Me and Jen had our own ideas of Nae' Nae'. We thought she was stuck up and thought she was better than us, etc, etc.

After, we were all married and had kids, we kept in touch by phone periodically. One day, I was having our usual awkward conversation with Nae' Nae' and discovered that somehow we were interested and liked the same things. What? How did this happen that I did not know this?

My idea of my sister was changed from then on. Suddenly, we were so much closer. Which was a relief and a revelation.

My baby sister? She has closed herself off from us. She has her issues that she has to deal with. I have tried to help. I can't.

We must leave the past alone and stop blaming people and our circumstances for our problems. Sure they contributed, but it's over and you can't change a thing. Just move forward and make today and every day after count. Keep reaching out to your family. Sure it's hard and frustrating and painful. But they are family who have gone through things with you. Do not give up on them.

 

Comments

Renee said…
Children need to stay together when parents get divorced... and for all that is Holy, should never have been dealt with the way we were in our parent's custody proceedings!

Popular posts from this blog

Divorce

My mom and dad split up when I was 9 years old. The marriage was pure hell for them and me. Yes, me! I had to hear my mom crying late at night because my father was out after work doing god knows what. (Well, we know cheating was going on). When he was around it was pure hell. I walked on eggshells and was sick to my stomach most of the time. My father acted like he just hated my mom. I didn't feel like he liked me much either. I was the only reason that they even got married. There was so much fighting, crying, and my mother had breakdowns, and I had to hear my father force my mother into sex acts. It was all quite sickening. So when he did leave for good, it was a relief! Although, I was pissed at them both. Why the hell did they even get married? It was the end of the 60s and my father grew up with strict religious parents who instilled in him that if you knock a girl up; you marry her. So, that's what he did. And that was so NOT the right thing to do. Although, if he

Grandparenthood - What They Don't Tell You

Being a grandparent is great. I love it! But there is another side. A side that is never talked about. I am not the only one who feels this way. I ask other grandparents and they agree. When I had my 4 children, I NEVER worried so damn much about them as I do my grandchildren. I don't know why that is. Or at least I didn't until yesterday. I have a theory anyway. Will talk about that in a moment. First, I want to tell you that it's my 2 daughters that are giving me these grand kids. My oldest granddaughter is 2 1/2 years old AND I have 4 granddaughters. YES, I REPEAT I HAVE 4 GRANDDAUGHTERS 2 YEARS OLD AND YOUNGER!!! Now what is the problem with this? Well, since it's my daughters, I am worried and scared to pieces for them the whole 9 months and have to listen to them complain about everything that is wrong with them. I try to tell them things are normal, blah, blah, blah. But in my mind, I'm thinking maybe something is seriously wrong and it's my fault for t

My First Wallet

I signed up for a craft exchange hosted by Craftaholics Anonymous . This is my 3rd summer participating. I choose this small organizing wallet to make for my partner.  This is the first wallet I have made and I think it turned out well. I follow a blog called Sew Can She . They have many cool craft tutorials featuring different tutorials from other blogs. So, the pattern actually came from LBG Studio . Next time, I will know what I'm doing and will make a few changes.  Front view. Open view Back view Inside Left. Inside Right. The right pocket is just big enough to put a small memo pad in. Also the left side holds cards or whatever you would like. I think it's a really neat thing to have in your purse. One always needs paper for something and extra room for do-dads. Also, kids would love this. I'm going to make some more for the granddaughters.