Friday, May 25, 2012

The LIfe & Times of a Registration Clerk


There is a sign that says: Please Take a Number and Have a Seat.

Also there is a sign stating what documentation we need from you.

Do not stare me down and burn holes through me. If you see me on the computer and taking care of papers and answering phones and being the jack of all trades then "NO, I AM NOT READY FOR YOU"

Just because someone walks out of my office, does not mean you can walk right on in uninvited. There is a number system people. I will call your number!!!!

DO NOT stand right at my window waiting for me when I am so obviously busy taking care of someone else.

Privacy is desperately needed. Stand the hell back!!!!

Do not expect me to read your mind. There is more than one reason why you could be standing there waiting for me.

If you don't know what you want then how the hell do I know.

There will be 10,000 interruptions and when that happens obviously things will take a lot longer than usual .

NO I don't have time to sweet talk you and smile and joke with you. I am here to register you and get you the hell out of my office so the next person can come in.

I have plenty of other things that are just as important and all should have been done yesterday, last year, last minute. You are not the only one in this world who has a problem that I need to fix.

If you see only 1 person in my office, things will take longer.

If you see people coming at me in all 3 directions and people calling me on all 3 phones at the same time, then obviously I will be getting a little testy. So shut the hell up and wait for your number to be called.

If I have to call out a number more loudly then you think I should, go suck an egg!!

If you are going to be late for your test, you should have come earlier.

I do have to take a drink, have a snack, pee, clear my mind, and vent some. I am a person. Not a machine. I can take only so much.

If you don't have what I need to do what I need to do and can't find the paperwork you think should be waiting for me. THINGS will be going ever so slowly. I don't have time to track down the whole entire facility and make 100 calls. Do it yourself. Here's an idea: Call the facility ahead of time to make sure your papers are there waiting on you.

Please know what the hell provider you went to because obviously I can't read a scribble and decipher a goddamn name from it. I have to get on the Internet and Google the facility and hope they have a website. Then load the site on my ever so slow computer and hope and pray I find the right provider. If I can't find the right one, I AM NOT REGISTERING YOU. I CAN'T PULL A NAME OUT OF MY ASS, PEOPLE!!!

AND OBVIOUSLY THIS TAKES MORE GODDAMN TIME THAN I HAVE TIME FOR.

However, if you are patient with me, I will be patient with you and be pleasant even though I am seething inside because of other people and employees, and different matters.

I need a drink........


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